“People do not need to behave a certain way for you to be happy… YOU need to behave a certain way for YOU to be happy.” These words of wisdom were trash to me a few years ago. “So, I should let people treat me however they want and smile anyway,” was my understanding of it all. “No, if they’re going to be jerks, I’m going to be an even bigger jerk.”
Only God knows just how exhausting that lifestyle was.
When I started working in ABA therapy, a kid came up to me, punched me and bit me, and my trainer said, “don’t react, just block it.” My immediate thought was “I’m just supposed to let this kid get away with doing this to me? How is he ever going to learn?”
Long story short, the first few months were filled with getting wacked, punched, kicked, bitten, spat on, and a whole bunch of other stuff. But, a year of consistent blocking, ignoring, and then redirecting how he should handle his emotions and communication with me… it was rare to see him get upset or furthermore attempt to hurt me. (Today’s work and patience creates a better future. Giving in to make the moment “easier” creates a tougher future)
One thing that I learned is that reacting to another person’s behavior is SO stressful and draining. Life is so much easier when you just don’t react. Why punish ourselves for the behavior of others?
Reacting usually seems like the right decision for the moment. It seems it will solve our problem for that very instant… but it won’t. It’s a waste of time and energy. And I am extremely literal about the “waste of time” part. If you knew you were going to die at the end of the week… would you truly be spending your time reacting to another person’s negative behavior toward you? I doubt it. Choose to live cheesy. “I might die at the end of the week, so, I don’t have time for this.”
I connected the dots to a Bible verse that says, “33 But seek first his kingdom and his righteousness, and all these things will be given to you as well.” Which is what God is advising for us to do because “The heart is deceitful above all things and beyond cure. Who can understand it?” (He advises us of the heart problems and gives us the solution by telling us to focus and what to focus on 😉 we serve a loving and wise God)
When someone is attempting to hurt us, are careless with how they treat us, or are creating anger in us… our emotions do get the best of us. And if we aren’t careful, we react on our emotions which then leads us to a form of regret. We have to be careful, cautious, and conscious about our emotions and who/what is being in charge. So, who/what is usually in charge of you? The truth of the person you are? Or the person that your emotions want you to be?
Focusing on Christ, His kingdom, and righteousness is a guide for everything. If you’ve been betrayed, lied to, hurt, abandoned, cheated, or anything else in that subject, it can create you to be someone you were not meant to be (As does media, music, magazines, and so on. Not that it’s bad, just have to be careful on what they make you believe you and your life should be like.) God did not create us to be cold or cautious in fear because of how others have treated us. He created us to be smart, creative, loving, and courageous. As we focus on Him, we remember WHO we are as HE handles everything else in life for us (jobs, relationships, finances.)
It all narrows down to “Who you are, creates your life.” For example: If you’re persistent and consistent, you will reach that goal. If you are lazy and careless, then you won’t be reaching any goals. You have all the freedom in the world to choose who to be. No-one can take that from you unless YOU allow it.
Don’t let anything take this truth from you. Be that person that God created you to be regardless of the behavior of others. People do not need to behave a certain way for you to be you or for you to be happy. It is your very own choice… you need to focus on how you behave for your own happiness.
#Behavior #Inspirational #Scripture #Happiness #Focus #Joy #Faith #Love #Patience